About Neil "Toby"
I help men live more satisfying and meaningful lives, often in the face of trauma.
You may feel anxious or depressed. You may be unhappy in your work or your relationships, and likely struggle with a harsh internal voice of self-criticism. Perhaps you’ve realized that events in the past continue to impact you and are preventing you from living the way you want to.
Many men have had physically, emotionally, or sexually abusive childhoods, whose impact they continue to feel. Less obvious forms of dysfunction in families can also deeply affect a child’s sense of worth into adulthood. Some of the men I work with have had frightening or painful experiences as teens and younger adults, involving bullying, addiction, the illness or loss of loved ones, or their own physical and mental health. Some have grown up in strict religious environments, or become involved later in life, and are struggling now with the consequences of leaving that religion.
You may have nightmares or insomnia, or find it hard to stop thinking about things that have happened. Maybe you’re jittery or on edge, or you “over-react” to seemingly small provocations. You look for ways to numb your feelings, or get rid of aspects of yourself you don’t like, but this isn’t really working and often causes more problems than it solves.
HEALING AND GROWTH
The good news is that we have innate resources that can empower us to heal and grow in the face of trauma. Often – perhaps especially in the process of our socialization as men – we lose touch with some of the resources that could help us. When you come to counselling with me, we’ll work together to help you rediscover and access those resources, process and resolve traumatic experiences, and find renewed pleasure and purpose in your life.
Please visit my website and reach out to make an appointment. I will reply to your email within 24 hours. If you do not receive my reply, please check in your spam folder (this has happened before) and/or telephone me.
